- I have slept a total of 24 hours in the past 6 days w/out a nap to speak of.
- I have a pretty good case of depression with a healthy dose of "generalized anxiety disorder."
- In an effort to treat problem #2, I take a little daily pill known as EFFEXOR.
When taking Effexor you should "call your doctor at once if you have any new or worsening symptoms" such as:
- mood or behavior changes: I am a cunt-ass-whore 92.7% of the time.
- anxiety: Uhhh...yeah! I have generalized anxiety disorder. Damn Gina!
- panic attacks: So that's what that was a few nights ago when I woke up, thought I was dying and going to jump out of my skin.
- trouble sleeping: Ummmm....Check.
- if you feel impulsive: Would an example of this be when I went around our apartment complex at 7:00pm knocking on doors to discover whose mother-fucking car was blocking me in?! I didn't need to go anywhere...it was the principle of it.
- irritable: Please see "impulsive."
- agitated: Constantly.
- hostile: Wanted to bitch-slap the owner of said car mentioned above. Was actually upset that I showed restraint.
- aggressive: See "hostile"and note my constant use of the word "Fuck"
- hyperactive (mentally or physically): I've loaded the dishwasher, made some tea, planned a Meetup for my 200+ members, brainstormed the process for starting my own book-club, and am blogging like a maniac and it's only 5:00 am...what do you think?
- more depressed: This one just makes me chuckle.
- have thoughts about suicide or hurting yourself: Maybe this is where my new urges to burn and cut are coming from.
- nausea: Yep.
- dizziness: Word.
- sexual side effects: This is a nice way of saying, "you'll still get super turned on, but good-luck with that cumming thing."
- sweating: My face...oh God...the sweating of my face.
- dry mouth: Like I've been talkin' to the Ganj day and night.
- loss of appetite: Of course...this would be the one side-effect I don't have.
- constipation: I wouldn't know a turd if it slapped me in the face and called me sweetheart. (TMI)
WHAT THE FUCK!
Well, at this point my options seem to be limited. I have tried just about every drug on the market and not one of them has worked. I was told by my doctor that this was my "last hope." I assure you, this is not hope. This is a one way ticket to jail or hell cause I am going to end up killing somebody or myself. I've tried not taking it. Within 12 hours of a missed dose the withdrawal symptoms are so intense I can hardly function. Fear not my friends. I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist who we'll call Dr. P. He's coming in at 8:00am on Saturday just for me. Until then, I'll be sure to have Emily keep my straight-jacket straps tight and pray that one day soon my Prince will cum...I mean come.