PUPPY! After doing a quick Google search for "exorcism" images to insert here...I was so damned disturbed I had to Google "Puppy". So yaaay...Puppy!
I am a heinous bitch (aka "agitated"), exhausted, irrational, dizzy, tired, experiencing some depersonalization, having "brain shivers", having shock-like sensations that involve me actually seeing lightening-bolts behind my eyes, I can't focus, my nightmares are more graphic and violent than ever and the thoughts of cutting...burning...eating until I explode are starting to run my life.
On top of all of this comes the guilt I feel for putting Em through this. She deserves better...much better. I made her cry last night. Not good people...not good at all. As a result of the guilt, I dream nightly of my engagement ring crumbling and Emily telling me she has other plans for August 1.
So....yeah...still super-disturbed by my Google search (Seriously...super fucked up). So yaaay..PUPPY TIME!