Introducing Our 44th President

Photo Courtesy of www.yahoo.com

No words can express the significance of this moment.

VOTE

I was officially awake at 3 am. Could it be the excitement of going to the polls this morning? Maybe it is...or it could be the fact that Em and I are the youngest senior citizens on the face of the entire planet going to bed at 8:50pm. Truthfully, this is not an appropriate bedtime for a professional insomniac like myself. Regardless, I am actually very excited to "Barack the Vote" and plan to be there when they open at 7:00am. I have never felt so anxious in my life about an election...the outcome feels so critical that my stomach actually hurts from the butterflies drop-kicking each other's asses.

During one of my random Blogspot blog searches this morning I stumbled upon the rants and raves of a young woman who looked about my age. Her top post was a picture of her and some friends ready to hit the town on Halloween, their costumes looked quirky enough that I thought I would skim through in hopes of finding another blogtastic blog. I learned so much so quickly...

1. She is always the bridesmaid never the bride, yet she gushes each time about the "beautiful bride" and how "lucky" she is to have a new "cuz" (Mike, Brian, whateve...you fill in the name.)

2. She finds people who use the term OMG "lazy" and "annoying".

3. She is a "devout Christian" doing the "work of God" based on quoted bible verses; therefore, she is voting for McCain.

Let us pause for a moment to mourn the loss of whatever brain-cells this blonde-bombshell has left and wrap it up with an OMG...WTF? The last time I checked, nowhere in the bible does it say "Vote for McCain" nor does it say "In order to be a Christian you must be a Repub." I am fearful today of those voting "in the name of the Lord." Voting without true knowledge of the issues and for the only white man in the room over the age of 70 who has a bible-thumping side-kick wearing fashion glasses in hopes of making her look less like she did the political research for her campaign on Wikipedia, and more like a "real American."

So today I ask that everyone go out and vote, and when you are standing behind that curtain don't ask yourself, "WWJD?". Instead, ask yourself which candidate is truly less likely to F-up this already struggling country of ours...then vote for Obama.

If She's Elected I'm Getting a Sex-Change

Sarah Palin makes me ashamed to admit that I have two "X" chromosomes. Come on...do you really need to ask why?

1. She thinks that the vice president is in charge of the Senate, so if she wants to she can "really get in there" and make some changes.

2. "Well, let's see. There's -- of course -- in the great history of America rulings there have been rulings." --Sarah Palin, unable to name a Supreme Court decision she disagreed with other than Roe vs. Wade, interview with Katie Couric, CBS News, Oct. 1, 2008

3. "I don't know if you're going to use the word 'terrorist' there." --Sarah Palin, asked if people who bomb abortion clinics are terrorists, NBC News interview, Oct. 23, 2008

4. I may not answer the questions that either the moderator or you want to hear, but I'm going to talk straight to the American people and let them know my track record also." --Sarah Palin, on not answering the questions in the vice presidential debate, St. Louis, Missouri, Oct. 2, 2008

5. "I'll try to find you some and I'll bring them to you." --Sarah Palin, asked by Katie Couric to cite specific examples of how John McCain has pushed for more regulation in his 26 years in the Senate, CBS News interview, Sept. 24, 2008

6. "Our opponent though, is someone who sees America it seems as being so imperfect that he's palling around with terrorists who would target their own country."

7. "One of my absolute best friends for the last 30 years happens to be gay and I love her dearly, and she is not my "gay" friend, she is one of my best friends, who happens to have made a choice that isn't a choice that I have made, but ... I'm not gonna judge people."

8. "And how long have I been at this, like five weeks?"

9. She is campaigning with Elizabeth Hasslebeck.

10. She bought her own $35 wedding ring and thought it was important enough to share during a rally.