Daddy Dearest

I had a difficult conversation with my Dad today...very difficult. One that included him calling me, "stupid" and hanging up on me. I had no idea that the word "stupid" could cut a person so deeply beyond the first-grade lunch table. But it most certainly can. I've got the marks to prove it. We were arguing about my mother's Medicaid application. Simply put she needs Medicaid to get the medical care she so desperately needs,and he just wants her money; therefore, he wants me to pull her Medicaid application and to start sending him her entire SSI check each month. Not gonna happen. Once I informed him of this he went totally ape-shit crazy. It was like living on 8th street all over again, only this time I am not 13, and I don't have to stand by while he talks to me like an abused dog. I want to find compassion in my heart for him, but I am struggling. I want to believe that he really loves my mother, but I am struggling. I want to not eat that entire pan of brownies downstairs, but I am struggling.